He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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