its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Randomize
