WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Randomize
