Sry I called you an 8
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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