oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize