Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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