the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Sober January is a disaster.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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