My balls are so social today.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
