Please, let me fuck your mom
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
