I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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