Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
