Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
you didnt know i had herpes?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
