So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
