I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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