So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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