My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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