goodnight i made you a song goodbye
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
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