I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
