It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
