I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
oh god the rape fog is back!
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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