I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
