I wish I could teleport
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I have fence marks all over my body
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
