Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
