I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
