Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
