All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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