I heard we made out
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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