you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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