Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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