so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
