you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Randomize
