can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Randomize
