What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Randomize