I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
