I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Mom said you looked used
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
