You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize