would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
