just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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