Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
