I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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