so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
