on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I would fuck him just for his dog
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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