If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
