Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm way too hungover for life right now
It was a blind-side dick pic.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
