dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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