I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
