let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
