so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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