woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
