At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
