Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
