She announced her abortion via fbk
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Randomize
